The last couple days have seen me feeling like a pendulum, swinging back and forth with different emotions and thoughts. Saturday afternoon I was ready to retire from racing forever. I could see no sense in ever doing anything on the bike again. Sunday afternoon I was pouring over maps, looking over gear, and otherwise planning the next great adventure.
Funny how that happens. What brings us back? Late in Saturday’s race, I told myself to “Remeber how this feels! Remember this pain!” And here’s the thing, I remember it crystal clear. I remember the sound of my face hitting the rocks, I remember the burn in my legs and lungs as I climbed Spiro…I remember it all. And yet, something inside rebounds faster than tired muscles, bruises and cracks. Is it the euphoria of crossing a finish line? The knowledge that you overcame pain and heat and competition? Maybe it has something to do with being in a constant state of delirium…
I can’t honestly say. But I would guess that for everyone it’s different.